Word Vomit

one fine day in the emerald city 002

The talons of not easily forgotten monsters creep in through the cracks of sanity and insanity.
Unhinged, unwelcomed, and undesired they claw into my waking reality.
Wounds that I didn’t know were still there, are opened and they bleed
As dirty poisonous, toxic thoughts spread and seed.
Roots that go so deep they swallow me entirely
I feel my air escaping as it gets tougher to breathe.
Empty hollow promises like ‘of me you have the best’
Rattle on my heart cage, splitting open my chest
And my heart jumps ship, sos to my brain
Clearly, this idea crossed the border of insane
Again and again faint whispers of before
Storm and trojan horse the helm of my heart’s door
Did it always hurt this much to give it all away
Was there something before that novacined the pain
Sneaking in are these beliefs I wasn’t good enough
I said ‘always’ and, in character, you called my bluff
There are nights that no lock can stop the attacks
I become a pillar of salt with all my looking back
Surely I was wrong and you were wrong, its really rather trite
I have notches in my bedposts for all my sleepless nights
You got the better end of the deal, if I’m being frank,
You got a freedom story I found a cave dark and dank
The stench of death dreams dying as I have to let them go
Seeing my essence fade from vibrant to a soft, subtle echo
A shell, a ghost, a trace of things I once believed
No shock in the aftermath, I was one decieved

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